Core values for Confidence- Learn how to identify yours
WHY IS KNOWING YOUR CORE VALUES IMPORTANT?
Because values are critical pieces of our “confidence and happiness” puzzle!
Let’s start with understanding a bit more about Core Values
Values and Beliefs form the foundations for understanding our Authentic selves!
Beliefs are our assumptions about the world.
Whilst Values are how we attribute worth to objects and behaviours.
Core values are deeply engrained principles or beliefs that are central to who we are as a person.
They express what we really believe about ourselves, people, life, and the world.
They are created from our life’s experiences, environment, upbringing, and culture, which means they are unique and often deeply embedded in our sub-conscious mind. That is until we know that something usually doesn’t feel right, or we finally are taught how to to identify them. (For many of us, this was when we started to a coach or counsellor.)
Values guide our behaviours, decisions, and actions around how we lead our lives.
They help us to differentiate between what we perceive as good & bad based on our beliefs.
When we act in alignment with our values, we feel fulfilled, harmonious and we grow in confidence.
When we act out of alignment with our values, we can feel dissatisfied, off-track, or even disconnected from ourselves.
Core values bring about a sense of purpose and self-worth.
They help us to stay grounded whilst also offering us clarity and focus based on what truly matters to us.
Core values are expressed as verbs.
To share some examples, here are my Core values:
Authenticity, integrity, fairness, curiosity, fun, kindness, compassion, freedom, and Kaizen.
(ok so Kaizen isn’t a verb! It’s a noun which traditionally describes a Japanese business philosophy, but it is a word that has always stuck with me because of its meaning, so I am giving myself a little Carte Blanche here! It means “continuous improvement or change for the better” which I just love!)
Core Values are not static, they can evolve.
As mentioned, core values stem from our experiences and environment from an early age, however it is important to know that they can evolve or change with time based on our new beliefs or experiences.
For the most part our deeper-set (MOST CORE) values are likely not to shift because they are linked to our most fundamental beliefs and ideals in life. It is usually our (BROADER) range of values which tend to be more fluid in their prioritisation and use based on the current situation or decision-making position we find ourselves in.
Here a visual of a boat represents our values. The hull of the boat represents our (most) core values which rarely change. Whilst, the the sails represent our (broader) core values. Still important to us, but the change and reprioritise dependant on the weather or seas (our environment).
Now let’s explore this quick and easy way to identify your Core values!
This technique uses a mixture of reflection and analysis to make it easier to identify your authentic values.
1. **Reflect on your Past Experiences – to a time when “you felt at your best”:**
Where you felt fulfilled, proud, in flow, or content.
What activities or aspect of those experiences made them significant for you?
Were you helping a friend learn a new skill, your value may be kindness, patience, or service.
Were you climbing a mountain and challenging yourself, your value may be courage or learning.
2. **Create a list Personal Qualities to discover your values: **
Jot down qualities you admire in others or aspire to embody yourself.
Ask yourself, “why is this xx important to me?” and “what is important about that”.
Keep asking these questions, again and again, until you are able to uncover the deeper values they represent to you.
NOTE: If you found it hard to put words to the qualities, emotions and ideas in the steps above, it may help you to look at my Values Cheat Sheet (list of examples) for examples.
Scan through the examples and circle all the values that you feel are resonate with you.
A watch out here is that you may be at risk of selecting values based on what we THINK we should choose, rather than identifying what really matters to us. To help mitigate this, really focus on step 4 (test your values)!
3. **Prioritize your Values List:**
Once you have your list of values, prioritize them based on their importance to you.
From most important down to the lease important.
4. **Test and define your Values: **
Then imagine a few scenarios where you need to make tough choices.
Evaluate which values would guide your decisions in these situations.
You should quickly be able to see which of you values are consistent or “non-negotiable”.
These are your (MOST) CORE values.
Narrow this down to the top 5 to 7 Most core values.
The remainder of the values on your list are most likely still important to you, however, you may have found that they were relevant in certain situations and not in others.
These are what I call your BROADER core values.
They are likely to be influenced or even possibly change over time.
5. **Revisit and Refine: **
Regularly revisiting and reaffirming these values can contribute significantly to personal well-being and a sense of direction in life. Life experiences, new perspectives, or personal growth might shift their order or introduce new ones.
AND REMEMBER….
Being aware of your values will help you navigate and provide a clear framework for decision-making, fostering authenticity, and aiding in personal growth. Moreover, they serve as a compass, helping you navigate complex situations and stay true to yourself amidst challenges.
Ultimately, this process of identifying values is personal. It helps create a roadmap for living a purposeful life that aligns with what truly matters to you.
Why not give it a go and see what comes up for you!