What is Authentic Confidence?
Authentic Confidence refers to a genuine and secure belief in oneself that is rooted in awareness and understanding of your own values, abilities, and identity.
It is an inner sense of self-belief and self-trust that comes from accepting and embracing who you truly are (yes! those pesky warts and all, but also your strengths and beautiful talents too!), rather than seeking external validation or trying to conform to social expectations.
Put simply, Authentic Confidence is having confidence from the INSIDE- OUT!
The more you know and understand yourself, the easier it will be to gain clarity around your true heart’s desires. It will also make it much easier for you to identify your next steps and understand what resources or skills you need to move you towards your goal.
Why is it important for lifelong happiness?
As you can imagine, your awareness of your physical and mental state and your current abilities at any given moment, allows you to feel more in control and at ease of navigating, adapting or learning in your current situation. This significantly reduces your stress and anxiety levels. It also helps you to achieve better results time and time again, leading to a happier, healthier and more accomplished life.
Think of it like driving a new car:
When you first learn to drive a (new) car, you are unsure of where things are or how the car itself operates. This means you are focused on the functional tasks of the car and probably feeling a little bit stressed and overcautious rather than being aware of the car’s performance or its full potential. This is how many of us experience life until we start checking in and learning about ourselves.
However, once you become familiar and understand the basic layout and function of the car, the basic tasks become almost natural and automatic. This means that your mind is clearer and is now able to focus on getting the best out of the car using its natural design and qualitires, whilst also being able to navigate or adjust your speed or driving style for when the external terrain may not be best suited for the car (adversity or challenges).
By learning to become the master of your own car (yourself), you will enhance your ability to adapt, navigate or learn to handle or overcome external factors. The more you understand the car and what it is currently designed to do, the more capable you are of playing to its strengths and increasing the overall performance. Allowing you enjoy your drive and journey time and time again.
How is this different to confidence from the OUTSIDE-IN?
Ever heard these comments?
- “Fake it ‘til you make it”,
- “Believe it and you can be it!”
- “act as if you are….. ”
These comments are tell-tale signs of confidence building from the outside- in approach.
An outside-in approach to confidence is used when you have identified a gap or development area in your current abilities.
As humans, we model ourselves on others when we need to learn something new. Think of babies acting or walking like our parents. We also use the power of our imagination to visualise or embody the “acting as if” role of how we want to feel or act so we can experience the new outcome. Being able to experience a new skill or feeling helps us to become familiar with it so that we access it and repeat or develop from it going forward. This really helps with developing new behaviours or different outcomes.
The big risk however, here is that in today’s world there is too much focus on this outside-in approach. We constantly compare ourselves to the Jones’s, social media, or specialists in their own area (thinking we need to be superhuman and do everything right), that we have started to forget who we really are. This has resulted in the rise of stress, anxiety, impostor syndrome, burnout and even depression.
When we don’t live by our own play book it makes it harder to for us to set our own boundaries or tailored our approach to life so we can use and conserve our energy wisely.
How can you build Authentic Confidence?
1. Self-Reflection: Take time to understand yourself. Work out your values, strengths, and weaknesses. Reflect on your passions, interests, and what truly matters to you. This self-awareness is the essential foundation for authentic confidence.
2. Embrace Imperfections: Recognize and appreciate that everyone has flaws and makes mistakes. Embrace your imperfections as part of your uniqueness and see mistakes as part of your learning journey. We are all work in progress! When you accept this and treat yourself with kindness, you will become empowered to navigate and learn so you can grow.
3. Challenge Limiting Beliefs: Listen to what you are saying to yourself. Identify and challenge any negative or limiting beliefs that undermine your confidence. Mentally focus on replacing these unhelpful beliefs with positive and empowering beliefs that affirm your worth and potential.
4. Align Actions with Values: Act in alignment with your values and resourceful beliefs. Make choices and decisions that reflect with who you truly are, rather than seeking validation or approval from others. Authenticity in your actions strengthens your self-confidence.
5. Practice Self-Care: Take care of your physical, mental, and emotional well-being. Energy is the essence of life. Prioritize self-care activities that nurture and recharge you. When you feel energised and good about yourself, you confidence naturally grows.
6. Seek Growth and Learning: Continuously seek opportunities for personal growth and learning. Set realistic goals from your heart-centre and learn to challenge yourself to step out of your comfort zone into an area of growth. Celebrate your achievements along the way, no matter how small. Every little step forward is progress!
Remember, building authentic confidence is a lifelong journey.
Be patient and kind to yourself as you embrace and express your true self in the world.
Discover your authentic self! Ask me how!
Join my engaging and insightful 10-module self-discovery Program where you will build your Authentic Confidence and Resilience.
Available as: 1-1 sessions or as a group programs (workshop / retreats.)
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